Work is work…
It’s early Monday morning, and I’m up so that I can print out my daily lesson plan just in case an administrator comes into my room and asks for it again. Unfortunately, I didn’t get a chance to print out this week’s plans yesterday, and of course I had a pop in. I had a good lesson and resources prepared and the girls and I were doing what we needed to be doing, but that one little mistake made me nervous and I stressed over it throughout the rest of the day (even though I really didn’t need to). So, despite my lovely life I still stress over paperwork and whatnot. Later, on the same day, a parent came to ask about her daughter and emphasize how important the child’s grades were. She was a kind and lovely woman, and I’m glad she stopped by, but I’m also even more stressed because what if I don’t have enough time with her daughter before the big exam in December? I care as much about her marks as she does.
Last week I wrote an advice piece for TeachUAE (I’ll share when it’s published), and I wrote something along the lines of delete “it’s unfair” from your way of thinking. And, ever since I typed those words I find myself reminding inner me to stop whining. I’m stressed because I want to do a good job, I want to help my kids get to where they need to go, but sometimes I feel like I’m getting pulled in a million different directions. There’s not enough time in the day; there’s too much paperwork; there’s too much to teach in too short of a time, etc., etc. I want to throw my lil temper tantrum and yell It’s Not Fair! I’m only human.
Sounds like I’m back at home, doesn’t it? Thing is the hard stuff doesn’t go away just because I’m on another continent, living the life. The job is still difficult because it matters, and darn it all I — like everyone else involved — still care about those kids.
Then when I come home there’s no Joe to rub my tired feet, no Kaylene to discuss the innards of life with, no Aaron or Kyle to tease about whatever odd thing they’ve done that day, no Meiko or Badger to drool on my lap. Of course I do still chat with all of them, but it’s not the same. I miss my family.
I miss autumn in the states as well. Even in Phoenix it’s getting cooler (although not by much). I’d be making stews and planning for birthdays, halloween and the upcoming holidays. Fire pit season begins soon as well — oh how I miss sitting under the stars laughing through the craziness that is our lives.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m still LOVING my life here, and I have a wonderful network of friends I laugh with here (sometimes at a shisha place, which has become my new version of the fire pit). I cannot believe how lucky I am to have had the chance to do this, and it’s paying back in ways I didn’t expect. I am not complaining about my life here at all. I just wanted to share that it’s not all beach time and parties. I stress, I worry, I miss, I wish for more just like I did when I lived on my own soil. Apparently, those things never go away.
That said I have a fun weekend coming up. I’m going to the Dave Mathews Band concert — woo hoo! Cannot wait! And then I have a 5-course tasting event at the St. Regis on Saadiyat. Plus, we have an extra day off next week, so I’ll have time to catch up on rest and grading.
And when I do go back home, I will miss all that I have here. So, basically, I think I’ve set myself up for a life of missing ‘home.’